Your Mom Is Poison Ivy

Ben dreads poison ivy more than anything else. We were talking about how Clint Johnson got it and we got talking about how Kim was very nice for taking care of Clint.

Ben: ewwwwwwwww im looking at poison ivy on wikipedia and it shows pictures of blistering from it ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
Ben: i would rather there was no poison ivy in the world than anything else ever
(Inbetween chat)
Ben: man if i had it on the pioneer trek i'd kill myself

Palmer: Exactly!!!

Palmer: Kim is thinking of letting [Clint] go for just today and then picking him up tonight.

Palmer: She is such a good mom.

Ben: your mom's a good mom
(pause)

Ben: that was meant to be a your mom joke

Ben: not like

Ben: saying actually your mom's a good mom

Ben: although im sure she is!

Ben: ahhh

Ben: this is going downhill
Palmer: I'm putting that on the blog.

Ben: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Ben: veto

Ben: she could read that!

Palmer: But...

Palmer: You're not insulting her!

Palmer: It's obvious that a your mom joke just turned the wrong way.

Palmer: It's so funny!

Ben: your mom is funny

Reset Button

So we were playing on the N64 and it froze (not unexpected from an N64) and so I went to push the reset button on the N64. Ben stares at me for the longest time as if I did something unknown to him. After staring at me, he spoke to me as if I did something despicable:

Ben: Did you just press the RESET BUTTON?!?!

Ben: Why would you EVER press the reset button?!

I fell over and laughed so hard that I couldn't breathe. He told me that the only amateurs that don't know anything about N64s press the reset button. Hahahaha

Very Punny

Palmer: Hey, which should I learn next, world capitals, or periodic table?
Ben: CAPITALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Palmer: Really?
Palmer: Oh.
Palmer: Haha. I get it.

Ben: oh i didnt even mean for that to be punny!

Ben: sweet

Ben: im awesome

Orangutan

Ben: Greg Devore asked me for your cell number on facebook chat, but I didn't see it til he had logged off.
Palmer: S'okay, he reached me.
Ben: Yeah, I'll bet he did.
Ben: He has long arms.

Pau Gasol

Ben: Pau Gasol is so ugly he should never be allowed to play basketball.

Ben's Words of Wisdom About Promises

Clint, Ashley, me, Jason, Max, and Damian were playing a game while Ben was half-watching half-reading a book. Clint was making a promise to Ashley in the game that would, for a short amount of time, alliance Clint and Ashley together and they would team up. Ben, unsuspecting, looked up from his book and exclaimed to us:

Ben: Always make promises in [the game], then break them--no matter what! That's how you win.

He later stated:

Ben: It works in life, too.

I don't think he was talking about the board game Life...

Everything is so Dramatic!

Whenever something really special, revolutionary, wonderful, or anything that makes my eyes get big happens, the conversation goes something a bit like this.

Palmer: DID YOU KNOW THAT YOU CAN ACTUALLY DO [Random act that Ben and I haven't heard of]!?!?!?
Ben: DA-NAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

For all your musicologists out there, the Da is any note that Ben picks (usually a high one) and the Na is just a half-step lower. Very effective at being suspenseful.

The Polls

Ben and I were arguing about whether or not this game sucked or not. Ben seems to always say that the "polls" say something (usually in high favor of his argument). This time, I told him what his polls said even before he had time to tell me about his polls. He got angry. This is the dialogue between the two of us.

Ben: FFTA was ranked worst thing ever of all time history
Ben: in a recent poll of FFTA fans
Palmer: Yeah, I'd agree.
Palmer: FFTA2 is much better.
Ben: yeah that was ranked 2nd worst thing ever of all time history in the same poll
Palmer: It was ranked best game ever in your polls and in mine.
Ben: no
Ben: you dont know my polls!!!!!
Palmer: Oh I don't, really?
Palmer: You don't know mine then...
Palmer: And mine say that it was the best.
Palmer: Sooo...
Ben: in a recent poll, 100% of people responded that you know 0 things about my polls
Palmer: Likewise about my polls.
Ben: in a recent poll of myself, i know 100% of things about your polls

--10:40 AM